Friday, June 29, 2012

I am getting excited about today, about this weekend, and about Sunday especially. First of all today is Friday, which is always a good thing. Second, I get to sleep in tomorrow which I am very excited about, plus I am probably going to buy a new bike. Third, I am getting baptized on Sunday. Last October I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I had been unsure of my Salvation for a while and one day if you would ask me if I was going to Heaven when I die I would say, "of course", but the next day if you would ask me the same question I would probably say (never audibly), "I honestly don't know". This bothered me for the longest time and every Sunday I dreaded the end of service and altar call. I knew that the pastor was going to have a time a prayer and reflection and that he was also going to ask if there was anyone who wanted to ask Jesus into their life if they would come forward and pray with him. Every Sunday whether I was at my church in Ruston or at my parent's church in Pineville I would be screaming and running wild on the inside, I wanted to go down front so badly. I wanted to yell at the top of my lungs, "I need Jesus"! I was a nervous wreck. I was afraid because I was already involved in church. I was afraid that if I went down everyone would judge me. I was afraid that if everyone knew that I was not already a Christian, somehow I would be thought of as being lesser. I had been dealing with many issues with friends and personal struggles for a while and I just couldn't do it on my own anymore. 
Switchfoot's album "Vice Verses" was released in early October and since Switchfoot is one of my favorite bands I purchased the album immediately. One of the first songs on the album is called "Afterlife". One of the verses or bridges, you'll have to forgive me, I don't know that much about music, but some of the lyrics say, "Cause everyday the world is made, A chance to change But I feel the same And I wonder Why would I wait till I die to come alive? I'm ready now I'm not waiting for the afterlife". As I was listening to this track I was thinking about my life, why would I wait until it's too late? What if I died and had not given my life to Christ? I e-mailed my pastor and asked him if I could talk with him, so on October 5th I went to his office and talked to him. I prayed and asked Jesus to come into my life and that day I started a personal relationship with Christ. I wish I could say that I have spent every day since then being perfect and doing exactly what I am suppose to do, but to be honest sometimes it feels as if I struggle more with temptation and trials than I did before. The difference though is that I am learning to rely on God. I tend to worry, a lot and it's easy for me to try and do things on my own. My Mimi always said, there is no reason to worry, and she was right. God knows exactly what He is doing, even if we don't. He has a good plan for each one of us, a perfect plan. Anyways, to finish up my story, here I am following up my decision to follow Christ with baptism. I am really excited. We are having a picnic and baptism at the park. My parents and my sister and brother in law are all coming in town. Now, instead of being scared, I am so excited that I can share my experience, and make a public profession of my Faith in front of my church. It's a great feeling to know that I am going to Heaven when I die.